What COVID taught me about letting go

I have been dodging this crazy virus for just over two years and it finally got me. Waking up feeling ordinary, dreading my full day ahead I did the right thing and took a RAT test. Thinking it was a clear result I jumped straight into my 8:00am Coaching Mentor Session. It was my husband who did school drop off then returned to work from home that stopped to check the test result on the bench and saw the faint line.

Naturally I went straight into organise mode, I finished off the call and had hubby collect the kids from school (of course, I had it when the close contact isolation rules were still in place). After the reality hit me, I started to go downhill, fatigue set in and the headache appeared. With a small break before my 3-hr virtual training session, I took a nap (which I never do as I always wake up feeling hungover – without the drinks), ate lunch, and had some Panadol to get me through to the finish line.

We took the approach to do our best to keep the virus contained, I had the front of the house (my bedroom, ensuite and office) with all windows and doors open for good air flow. Anyone entering the area wore a mask and gloves to collect dishes and empty cups of tea.

Part of my organise mode was to touch base with people that I had been in contact with over the few days prior (within my infectious period) to give them a heads up and monitor for symptoms. This is when I found out my best friend had tested positive too, we were in this together. It was one of the highlights (besides the enforced rest) having someone to share it with, compare symptoms, check-ins, organise surprise deliveries, and plenty of laugh-out-loud text messages!

Once I cleared my calendar and the initial shock subsided, that is when it really hit me. My body was tense, locked up, my legs couldn’t straighten as my hamstrings were that tight! Is this even a symptom? I had the common ones, signs of a head cold, runny nose, scratchy throat, and a tickly cough (that I still can’t shake, 20 odd days later!).

It literally took 2-3 days for me to surrender to being sick. Letting go is hard, I had to let go of control and you know how hard that is for a strong, independent woman who runs a tight ship – work schedule and household. I needed to trust that everything would work out fine.

I focused on my mindset and energy. I let go of perfection, oh this one was hard, but I had to let go of what the house was going to look like once I emerged and let go of the little things like the way the washing was hung out (at least it was getting done!).

I had to listen to my body, what energy I did have and how I could best use it. I had an idea one day to do some admin work, that didn’t last long. It quickly swapped out for a good book and a lot of lying around watching Netflix.

Overall, it was nice for the household to get a taste of what gets done without them even noticing most days. It turned out more than fine. I got some well-deserved rest and I am continuing to work on letting go of my inner control freak and reallocating household tasks to lighten my load. I am also excited to share that since early April I have increased my reading and smashed through four massive novels. I have really enjoyed my new little habit of relaxing with a good book at the end of the day.